Particularly the problems manifest themselves at night. We've managed to settle ourselves into an unsettling routine. He goes to bed (at an unpredictable time between 6pm and 11pm). And then at that first waking (between 12am and 3am) we find ourselves on the couch... for the rest of the night. I am too tired to stay awake for a full nursing (remember, he's a slow little eater) and then a few hours later when we wake up, it's time to nurse again. It's turned itself into a perverse sort of co-sleeping with me in the upright position (talk about a kinked neck) and Raymond nestled into the boppy on my lap.
This has been going on for months, folks. We won't even go into the irregularity and brevity of his naps.
Last week, I decided it really needed to end. And soon. Since real co-sleeping (him in bed with us) is just not an option for us, I decided I needed some professional help to get us out of this mess. I started researching books on baby sleeping habits and made a little list of ones I hoped the library might have. Lucky for me (since the library didn't have any of them), my sister-in-law, Jeanine, had Healthy Sleeping Habits, Happy Baby. Goodness! I've been reading like a madwoman for a week now.
And I must say, Hallelujah!
While I don't want to jinx it, I just want to praise the fact that Raymond slept in his own little crib from 7:30pm to 6:30am with only a 45 minute feeding at 3:00am. And I woke up in my own bed this morning. Wow. I recognize that there is still much work to be done, and it's probably not always going to be such smooth sailing. But, wow. I recognize that it is my responsibility, even duty, to make sure he is getting the sleep he needs. Since I have been working so hard on helping him nap during the day (recognizing his sleepy signs and getting him to sleep before he's too fussy) and have established some going-to-sleep routines for day and night sleeping, he's perhaps going to sleep better at night. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
I must say that I agree with Dr. Weissbluth that a well rested family is of utmost importance. So here's to sleep and the hope of more in the future!
16 comments:
Oh so happy for you! Good luck!
i ordered the book. lol. i had the same problem so we have just co slept and it has worked great. but kade is starting to not sleep so good in our bed and i am getting less sleep as well. so we have been working on getting him to sleep on his mattress. since he is still nursing. but even on great nights he is only on his mattress for 3-4 hours.
Yay!!! Whatever it takes to make it work for you is definitely the way to go. It's much more difficult to be a good mom when you are sleep deprived (as I have been reminded this week). Note to self: go to bed early!!!!
How happy i was to find that i had a post of yours to read on my lunch break!!! Good for you and baby Raymond!!! I hope that the progress continues. I love reading post from people i know about their woes of parenting... I feel like its one of the best ways to educate yourself for what the future might bring with little ones :) thanks Carly :)
I'm so glad that things are working better! That is such good news. Not sleeping is the worst. It's so hard with a new baby especially. Here's to another good night!
That so great!!!! I did exactly the same thing with Levi, couch sleeping is not fun. But about 3 months I figured out what his sleeping cues were and suddenly it was 100x better! Never underestimate what sleep can do for you as a mother.
I'm glad things are going better with sleeping - you feel like life is somewhat more normal once you get it figured out. We had to train Angie to sleep in her crib. We used rolled up swaddling blankets to help her feel tucked in, and we would stand for hours holding her paci in her mouth until she finally fell asleep. She luckily grew out of that in a few weeks. Her long sleep stretches started out at 2 am and then slowly worked their way backwards and longer until she made it through the night. I've heard that's a good book. I hope things keep going well for you!
YEAH! I loved this book. Cansas and Jason gave it to us and it is awesome. I hope that it works, I know that if you stick to it it works miracles. We have a little night wanderer we need to work on again. Ugh.
So let me just say I LIVED this book with all my babies. I recommended it to Cansas who called me crying about the sleep thing when gavin was little. Hunter was really bad so my friend recommended it to me & it worked wonders!...I love love love this book. Whenever someone says something about the sleeping thing this is what I recommend. Its awesome! Yay for good books!
ps. I am glad you loved the red sneakers! Have you ever seen anything so stinkin cute? :)
Oh CARLY!! Had I but KNOWN!! This is my sleep baby bible. After (ahem) 10 months of no sleep with Hallie my cousin recommended it to me. Never gave Chase the chance to put us through what Hallie did. Love this book. I give it to all my friends who are new Moms and have bleary eyed haven't slept in months and months look on their faces. :) So glad that you're getting a little more sleep these days. Love you Carly!
I will have to read this book before the baby comes. I think sleep deprivation is the hardest thing with a newborn. I am glad you get to sleep in your own bed!
Oh! Kessa isn't the best sleeper either. She does fine at night (we co-sleep and it has saved my sanity) but naps are ridiculous. She used to sleep just fine in her bassinet for naps, but now she will only fall asleep if we're holding her. Either on her tummy in a football hold, or if I have her wrapped up in my baby wrap. And even then, only if we're walking. And preferably outside. I have been reading sleeping books like crazy... everything the Provo and Orem library have. My biggest beef is that they focus so much on sleeping through the night and not so much on naps.
I just finished the No-Cry Sleep Solution that has some good ideas that I think I'll try. But if you figure out naps and have any tips, let me know, please!
And perhaps I'll find this book and read it, too.
Well I have no experience in that area but am glad things are starting to look up for you both! Good luck, I hope it continues!
Wahoo!! I am glad you are finding something that is working :) Seriously, more sleep is good for the family :) YOu are a good Mom. Sara recently taught me (or maybe it was Stanford) that when the baby sleep is when their brain develops. That made me really think. It has made me really realize how important good sleeping is. We finally (knock on wood) have night time going good, but naps Chase is just struggling lately. Yea for Raymond doing good last night. I love you Carly Jane. Keep being the amazing Mom you are. :)
I'm so glad you found something that is working for you and Raymond! It was fun talking to you the other day. Mom said she had so much fun hanging out with you and RayJ :)
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